Comments on: Listen Up Parents: Voices of Transracial Adoption http://damnstraight.oversampled.net/2006/10/31/listen-up-parents-voices-of-transracial-adoption/ Culturally Queer News and Views from Abigail Garner Fri, 05 Sep 2008 16:32:57 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 By: Karen G http://damnstraight.oversampled.net/2006/10/31/listen-up-parents-voices-of-transracial-adoption/#comment-1705 Karen G Mon, 06 Nov 2006 14:04:24 +0000 http://damnstraight.oversampled.net/?p=462#comment-1705 As one of those white adoptive parents raising 2 boys who are African-American, I appreciate your comments and thoughts and will continue to challenge myself and my husband to struggle with the complex, uncomfortable and very real truth that is always apart of transracial adoption. Parents who think there are no issues or expect/demand that their children be silent, grateful or just like them are diminishing their children and themselves and denying the rest of us the gift of the full potential/identity of their child. I want my boys to be fully who they are meant to be - and that cannot happen if I don't acknoweldge the total truth of who each of them is - and listen to how they experience that truth - even if it is painful or uncomfortable to me. It's not about me! I talk with waiting parents sometimes and they are so focused on "getting their baby" - it's all about them. I have been there and the system perpetuates that attitude also - but it will be a long hard road for everyone if, at some point, the adoptive parents don't realize that what they are doing is about the child first and foremost. Thanks for listening and raising good points and thoughts. As one of those white adoptive parents raising 2 boys who are African-American, I appreciate your comments and thoughts and will continue to challenge myself and my husband to struggle with the complex, uncomfortable and very real truth that is always apart of transracial adoption. Parents who think there are no issues or expect/demand that their children be silent, grateful or just like them are diminishing their children and themselves and denying the rest of us the gift of the full potential/identity of their child. I want my boys to be fully who they are meant to be - and that cannot happen if I don’t acknoweldge the total truth of who each of them is - and listen to how they experience that truth - even if it is painful or uncomfortable to me. It’s not about me! I talk with waiting parents sometimes and they are so focused on “getting their baby” - it’s all about them. I have been there and the system perpetuates that attitude also - but it will be a long hard road for everyone if, at some point, the adoptive parents don’t realize that what they are doing is about the child first and foremost.

Thanks for listening and raising good points and thoughts.

]]> By: Tobi http://damnstraight.oversampled.net/2006/10/31/listen-up-parents-voices-of-transracial-adoption/#comment-1653 Tobi Thu, 02 Nov 2006 05:19:04 +0000 http://damnstraight.oversampled.net/?p=462#comment-1653 This is a subject that has been growing in my mind. As a product of transracial insemination, I also ended up as a person of color being raised by white parents. I'm hoping to write something about it soon. I'll share it with you when I've finished it. This is a subject that has been growing in my mind. As a product of transracial insemination, I also ended up as a person of color being raised by white parents. I’m hoping to write something about it soon. I’ll share it with you when I’ve finished it.

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