Aug 16th, 2004
Philadelphia Inquirer Article about Spouses Coming Out
Sunday’s edition of the Philadelphia Inquirer (8/15/04) includes quotes from an interview with me about gay and lesbian people coming out to straight spouses and their children.
“And what of families left behind?
Spouses and children may suffer when someone comes out of the closet. There are places to turn.”
By Beth Gillin
Excerpt:
Straight spouses commonly are asked, “How could you not have known?” said Abigail Garner, 32, whose father came out as a gay man when she was 5. For her book, Families Like Mine: Children of Gay Parents Tell It Like It Is, Garner interviewed more than 50 children of gay parents, most from homes where a parent came out after the children were born.
“In some cases, a parent knew the other person had a same-sex attraction, but both wanted a partnership, a friendship, a connection on some other level with a person of the opposite sex. Perhaps they thought the same-sex attraction would fade away, or wouldn’t be a significant factor in the marriage,” Garner said.
“Then there are situations where a straight spouse is completely shocked to find that the other person is gay or lesbian or bisexual. It can come as a total surprise - and yet often, with the disclosure, a lot of things start to make sense.”